Bill, you've been gamblin' again
Gee honey, I'm sorry
If only you meant it

Why can't you behave?
Oh, why can't you behave?
After all the things you told me
And the promises that you gave
Oh, why can't you behave?

They switched the dice on me, baby

Why can't you be good?
And do just as you should
Won't you turn that new leaf over
So your baby can be your slave?
Oh, why can't you behave?

There's a farm I know near my old hometown
Where we two can go and try settlin' down
There I'll care for you forever
Well, at least till you dig my grave, oh
Oh, why can't you behave?

Gee, I need you kid
I always knew you did
But why can't you behave?