Hey everybody! It's good to be here at the Krusty Kantina
We got a real special show for y'all tonight
Featuring my new best pal, this guy!
He's an idiot

So, what are we gonna sing about, SpongeBuck?
We're gonna sing a song about friends
What kinda friends, SpongeBuck?
Well, listen up and I'll tell ya!

Who's there for you when you are sad and down?
Idiot friends!
Who picks you up and smacks you all around?
Idiot friends!
Who puts thorns in you so you can save the town?
Idiot friends, idiot friends
Idiot friends!

Da Da-da-da Do-da Doot Doh-doh
Idiot friends
Da-dee Da-da A-do Da Da-da Da
Idiot friends
Dee Da-da Da-do-doh Da-doh

Ya know, SpongeBuck
All we been a-doin' is singin' about what I've done fer you
Well, what have you done fer me?
(Ha ha ha!)
Who helps you pick your pants up off the ground?
Thanks, buddy!
(Curses!)
Only an idiot friend would do that
Let's bring it home, idiot friend
Okay!

Who lets you ride on his coffin?
Who slaps you hard and often?
What do you and me have in common?
We're idiot
Friends!