[Spoken]
On October 31st, a day that we all refer to as Halloween, throughout this great country of ours, small groups of armed children race, race from house to house demanding protection money. 

Or at least it seems as though that's what they're doing now. I remember when I was a kid, and probably when most of you were kids, we had a lot simpler motivation, right? A couple of jelly beans would do us in, right? You'd stand outside, freezing weather, stand outside a door in a cardboard costume, right, waiting for a couple lights to go out, and you'd tippy-toe up to the front door, very quiet, everybody scared. 

Knock knock knock knock
"Yeah kid, whaddaya want?"
"Boo."

Nowadays they have a much more persuasive policy. First of all they arrive in a motorized division, right? 

"All right, junior, get out. Your mother and I will wait for you here."

And then when the child gets up at the front door he's none too gentle about it. 

Ka-boom, ka-boom, ka-boom
"Yes, what, what is it?"
"Alright pops, what's it gonna be?
The candy or your front window?"

Well in England they have a counterpart - almost, that is. They go from house to house, not during Halloween nor do they call it trick or treat. They go instead during the Yuletide season. They call the custom wassailing; we call the song A' Soalin'. 

[Intro]
Hey ho, nobody home
Meat nor drink nor money have I none
Yet shall we be merry
Hey ho, nobody home
(Hey ho, nobody home)
Meat nor drink nor money have I none
(Hey ho, nobody home)
Yet shall we be merry
Hey ho, nobody home
Hey ho, nobody home
[Chorus]
Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please, good missus a soal cake
Apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry
Any good thing to make us all merry
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all

[Verse 1]
God bless the master of this house and the mistress also
And all the little children that round your table grow
The cattle in your stable, the dog by your front door
And all that dwells within your gates, we wish you ten times more

[Chorus]
Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please, good missus a soal cake
Apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry
Any good thing to make us all merry
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all

[Verse 2]
Go down into the cellar and see what you can find
If the barrels are not empty, we hope you will be kind
We hope you will be kind with your apple and strawber'
For we'll come no more a' soalin' 'til this time next year

[Chorus]
Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please, good missus a soal cake
Apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry
Any good thing to make us all merry
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all
[Verse 3]
The streets are very dirty, my shoes are very thin
I have a little pocket to put a penny in
If you haven't got a penny, a ha' penny will do
If you haven't got a ha' penny then God bless you

[Chorus]
Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please, good missus a soal cake
Apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry
Any good thing to make us all merry
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all

[Outro]
Now to the Lord, sing praises all you within this place
And with true love and brotherhood, each other now embrace
This holy tide of Christmas of beauty and of grace
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy
(Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please, good missus a soal cake
Apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry
Any good thing to make us all merry
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all
Three for him who made us all)