[Intro:]
All this talk about me being the best
But you know that it wouldn't really be that hard to beat me in a rap battle
Not that I ever participate in rap battles because if I did I would lose pretty much immediately
But you know, I try my best, I think

[Verse 1:]
When I play video games
I lose pretty much every single time
When I start rapping fast
I start slurring my ulululululul
When I write a lyric down
I forget how to say something profound
And when I make a dope-ass beat
I ruin it with my horrendous voice
Try to compete, well you probably can
It's not hard to beat me hand-to-hand
In a fistfight in the nearest park
I don't even know where to start

[Chorus:]
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
[Verse 2:]
My skills are non-existent
My insults are always misses
I can't make a good verse to save my life
Come on in and turn out the lights
To punch me in the face and steal my money
I couldn't stop you, now isn't it funny
How no matter how hard I try
I'm probably going to die
By another gangster as dope as me
Because I don't know how to flee
I can't even finish a verse

[Chorus:]
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can

[Verse 3:]
Last I tried to make some raps
It just ended up being crap
But Issues With Aggression number one
Rocked so hard and was really fun
But even with that amazing album
I still can't manage to make some cash
If you want to give me money
I would strongly encourage that
You all know how hard I go
On a beat that's cool as snow
Despite all that, I'm still easy to beat
Not so hard to defeat
Call me dumb, or call me lame
Call me lazy, or call me insane
No matter what you think of my songs
I'll still make them seven minutes long
[Chorus:]
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can
Try to compete with me
Well, you probably can