[Verse 1]
Well some people try to pick up girls
And they get called assholes
This never happened to Gertrude Stein
She could walk down the street
And girls, they could not resist her stare
And so Gertrude Stein, she was never called an asshole
Not in gay Paree

[Verse 2]
Now girls would turn the color
Of a fresh avocado
When she cruised down the street in her pink El Dorado
She could cruise down the street
And girls, they could not resist her stare
So Gertrude Stein, she was never called an asshole
Except by Alice

[Verse 3]
I get mean and I get [?]
Me and my straight [?] flannel shirt asshole
This here is the story of Gertrude Stein
She could walk down the street
And girls, they could not resist her stare
And so Gertrude Stein, she was never called an asshole
Except perhaps by Ernest Hemingway
[Verse 4]
Some people try to pick up girls
And they get called assholes
This never happened to Gertrude Stein
She could walk down the street
And girls could not resist her stare
And so Gertrude Stein, she was never called