[Song 1: They Caught Me]
They caught me frenchin' my cousin under the mistletoe
Not again!
Oh what a shame that we got caught
Yip a dubby dub bub

[Song 2: Baby Did You Know]
Baby, did you know that most Christmas songs were actually written by Jews?
B-b-baby, did you know?

[Song 3: I'm Standing under Mistletoe (Waiting for Some Chicks)]
I'm standing under mistletoe
Waiting for some chicks (x2)
I'm standing under mi--

[Song 4: Christmas Time Is Here Once More]
Christmas time is here once more
Tum ticky-ticky tum
Ticky tum too
I want a Playstation 4
Tum ticky-ticky tum
Ticky tum too

[Song 5: We're Worried About You, Santa]
We're worried about you, Santa
We're worried about your weight
Obesity's a health issue
That really can't freaking wait
You're too damn fat
Santa you're too damn fat
[Song 6: One I Just Made up on the Spot]
Jingle those bells
And deck the halls
And frosty, Rudolph, Santa's sleigh, and a mistletoe, and a Dreidel too

[Song 7]
Kwanzaa is important, too
So break out your menorahs
Or what ever you guys use
I don't know
I'm not Kwanziaan
So

[Song 8: The Candy Canes Song]
Candy canes!
Candy canes!
Lick them in a spear and kill your enemies
Stab (x16)
Candy canes are here forever
Even in imperfect weather
If you disagree, blow me
Cause candy canes are for the boys

[Song 9: Christmas Dad]
I wish I had a dad for Christmas
He told me he was going to the store
I don't think he did