[Song 1: Kermit]
Christmas is a corporate invention

[Song 2]
Let's not talk about politics at the Christmas table
Let's not talk about politics at the Christmas table
Let's not—
Yo I think Hillary should be shot
Oh!

[Song 3]
And the world's gonna know your name
What's your name, man?

Alex, and I love Christmas
My name is Alex, and I love Christmas
And there's a million gifts I haven't wrapped
Just give me time
Please give me time

When he was 10, he found out Santa wasn't real
He couldn't deal
Bo doo bada bop bop boo

[Song 4]
I wanna play with the dreidel
But I don't know if it's a sin
Cause I'm not even Jewish
Nah, I'll just give it a little spin
Ah, I'm in Hell, aren't I?
[Song 5: Erin & Jack]
Oh, that ornament doesn't go there
*drops ornament* Is that where it goes?

[Song 6]
Hey pretty girl, welcome to my home
Oh, look at that, it's mistletoe
You have to kiss me, that's the rule
Haven't brushed my teeth since 2011

[Song 7]
Go away!

[Song 8]
Jingle my bells, baby
Jingle my bells, please
Jingle my bells, baby
Jingle my bells, please

[Song 9]
Wrapping gifts is easy, bud
All you got to do is ignore the blood
Aw, man

[Song 10]
Peppermint Mocha (mmm)
Eggnog Latte (mmm)
Caramel Brulée (mmm)
Spiced Sweet Cream Cold Brew (mmm)
Gingerbread Latte (mmm)
Chestnut Praline (mmm)
Holiday Spice Flat White (mmm)
[Song 11]
Now Santa knows that you've been good
And you want a PS4
But the reason you're not gonna get it is
'Cause Santa hates the poor

[Song 12]
Eggnog, Frosty, Blitzen, Bublé
These are Christmas words I know
Chestnuts, chimney, stockings, sadness
Yet more Christmas words I know