I see a damsel in danger and distress -- I see that she is pretty...
I see a young girl dressed in a dirty dress -- I see that she is pretty...

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?
I see a fat girl with her hair a mess -- I see that she is pretty...
I see a proud girl, she's pregnant, I would guess -- I see that she is pretty...

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?
Mirror, mirror, do not fail, who deserves to go to jail?
I see the school girls dressed in their Sunday best -- I see that they are pretty...
I see the wagon trains of pioneer women heading west -- I see that they are pretty...

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?
Creature, creature, here the plan leads unto the fall of man
I see a matron unbuttoning a tightly fitting dress -- I see that she is pretty...
I see a maiden, she's careless like all the rest -- I see that she is pretty...

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?
Mirror, mirror, do not fail, who deserves to go to jail?
Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the prettiest one of all?
Mirror, mirror, humor me, do they see what I see?