Hey, Jim Dog
Bring all the women right down front
Right here in front of me
Bring all the girls right here
I wanna talk to 'em 'bout two minutes

I'm tellin' you, ladies, I wanna apologize, but beware
I tried to save the fellas, but they ain't nowhere
I'm tellin' you (Stool pigeon, stool pigeon)
Who's that said stool pigeon?
Somebody called you a stool pigeon
Don't pay no attention to that, just listen to me
Ladies, I'm tellin you, the fellas ain't no good now of days

Stick around
Don't be no clown
Don't let me down
And listen to what I'm puttin' down
Pay attention

If he drives you to the beach
And starts to reach
(Look out, sister, look out)
Look out, sister, look out

If he says "You look fetchin'"
And wanna show you his etchin's
(Don't go up there)
Don't go up there
I'm tellin' you, don't you go up there
If he says you look good in a sweater
Go home and write him a letter
Mhm

If he buys you quarts of champagne
Take a train and go to Maine
(Get outta town)
Get outta town 'fore it's too late

If he says "Darling, you look just like my mother"
Go home and get your big brother
(Sap him up)
And have him sapped up

What'cha sittin' there gigglin' for?
This ain't funny
Look at her sittin' there gigglin'
Hee hee hee, the Devil
Pay attention to me
Don't be lookin' around at them, look at me
Don't listen to nobody but me
Don't listen to Walt, Dewinchel, Gabriel, Heeter, Ed Sullivan, Nuwella Possils, Jimmy Fiddler, J. Edgar Hoover, Billy Road, John L. Louis, Dan Burler, Mr. Anton, and nobody
Pay attention to me

If somethin' happen to you this summer, you say I didn't tell you
I'm givin' you some knowledge straight from the shelf
This is some jive I use myself
I've found it to be successful to a marked degree
And I'm givin' it to you free

If he wanna take you for a ride in his car
Don't stay too long and don't go too far
If he says "Darling, I feel so lucky"
Tell him to get a train and go to Kentucky

If he says you look groovy
And he wanna put you in a movie
He ain't no talent scout
He don't know what it's all about

If he laughs at all your jokes
Says he only drinks cokes
And your brand is all he smokes
And he wanna meet your folks
Don't believe him, it's a hoax
Tell him to get lost, he's a moose

Put down that fashion book and pay attention to me

If he says "Darling, darling, I'm on the square"
Go on home and leave him there
If he says he "wanna take you for a date
You look great"
Tell him to go jump in the lake
He ain't nothin' but a fake
You better stop that gigglin'
Look at her sittin' there, gigglin'
You'd be surprised what they're framin' up on doin' this summer on vacation
Stop that laughin' and pay attention to me
(Don't leave out nothin')
Listen to what I'm talkin' about
Listen

If he wants to buy you clothes
And nylon hose
And take you 'round the nation
On a two week vacation
Buy you diamond rings and mink coats and everything
And he's a mellow creature
Who wanna call the preacher
You don't have to look out

You've got him, hold on to him
Take him home to mother
Look out
Don't tease him, mm-mm, don't tease him, just squeeze him
Look out
Sister, you better look out
Oh oh