Don’t Flop
Oshea vs. Tony D (Round One)
[Oshea:]
Listen as I spit jed
The d in Tony D stands for dickhead! BARS!
Listen, I struggled to prepare for this, I swear this shit
It wasn't cause of Writer's Block
It's just cause I don't think this prick is worthy of the title shot
So on that basis alone
I'ma hit him with more punches than a jet lee set
He said his misses doesn't like white boys
She hasn't met me yet!
Listen, see. You the biggest of arse like Nicki Minaj
You need to start improving your swagger
Maybe start moving like Jagger
You had a couple of decent battles
Like you suffer in delusions of grandeur
You beating me? You the stupidest wanker
That shit is as likely as seeing fucking hadoukens from Blanca
You want jokes? I got jokes like I hate him blatantly
The Queen's jubilee bought some bun ting
From a Jamacian Bakery
You want bars? Like [?]
So let's see if Tony can go toe to toe and bar with me
So me beat T in 3, that's some easy shit
Cause one punch leave T bagged like PG Tips
You from that PP Click, your team legit, I be respectful
But I don't read the script, so it goes fuck Tony D
Run up in his house like only me
Pull up on your couch, smoke for free
I'll stink your house out; pot pourri!
Listen, I'll pass toast and weed like no fail
You best make that sale for me. Cause if not there's four or more shells on your back; snail orgy!
That's as clever as I'm going to get
Cause all those thought out, drawn out punches truly bore me
I'm just trying to call you Ali Campbell Tony cause sooner or later you be 40!
Now I'm not young, I'm 28, I'm pushing thirty, kidda
But you're older than Me, Joker and Verb-T kidda
I show no mercy, low down dirty bastard
I've got my fingers in all sorts like Bertie Bassett
You don't understand I'm blessed on some [?] shit
One punch will have him facing the wrong way like a journey
BACKWARDS!
My bars leave the crowd amazed, like early magic
Your bars are old and stale, like a Boxing day turkey sandwich
See, all that bars over jokes bullshit is for nerdy faggots
Cause we're both grown adults – none of it really matters!
I'ma end this round on some jokes that are fucking hilarious!
The only time I say blood, blood is when I'm sucking blood out of your Mother's period! With a straw
Listen, I fucking hate you cockney bellends
With all your rhyming slang and your mad words
You'd probably go to a German restaurant and probably order a fucking brap-wurst!
I'm Oshea! I stay Scouse like Ken Dodd
Shoot a man from 12 yards, hence spot
I'll get up in your misses like a femdom
And sent Sprungy around your house so he can drop the fucking N-Bomb! NOBHEAD! NOBHEAD!
[Tony D:]
First title shot, if I had to take a guess
This should have been Deffinition's spot, so certain I would have placed a bet
But it's Eurgh's desicion
And it's got a couple of his mates upset
But Paul or Me? What's the difference?
Either way you're facing Deff
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