If there was a song for this
I'd play Broken Hearted Girl
I'd lay in my bed and cry until the sun came up
I'd shake sometimes because my body was addicted to the highs
My mom noticed my addition too late
She started to take the bags away from home when she left for work
I struggled with taking pain meds that wasn't mine
I'd listen to sad love songs and cry
I didn't sleep
I didn't eat
I didn't do much of anything
I'd stay in my room
For days and days
Sometimes I'd go in my closet and lay on the floor
Praying to God for help
I went to the ER many times and no help
They wanted me to admit I'd hurt myself
Then put me in a home for help
I don't want to hurt myself although it crossed my mind
I'd think about driving underneath big trucks because my car is small enough to fit
But what about the driver and perhaps other people I could possibly hurt
Their families, my family
I couldn't hurt myself for good reasons
I know there's more for my life
But until then I'll cry my way through the valley until I find the big light
That's my refuge