[Verse 1]
Two little ducks sank with a knock knock knock
She got twenty on tick and smoked the bloody lot
The fridge was bare, the dog was bones
Weavin' and a-bobbin' when the tallyman calls
Mary, Mary, she went up the wall
And she kissed bye bye to the holiest Joe
Played the wild rover and climbed on board
Says, 'It's all that the lady of the manor can afford'

[Chorus]
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder

[Verse 2]
Meet Miss Morrissey, fingers light
She lifted up his hat and he wept all night
She's the woman with the granny bag dressed to the nines
The pleasure and the privilege mine all mine
Candid camera on every bloody wall
All the cameras under heaven couldn't catch 'em all
Fill those pockets and lift that grail
Lead me into temptation, girls

[Chorus]
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
[Bridge]
Everything I do, I do it for you
Everything I do is driven by you
Driven by you? You don't have a clue
I make your songs better and you always try to sue!
Money, money, money
It's gone to your head
I sample too much and you say 'the music's dead'
Dead?
Huh! You're the one that's dead
Lots of money spent on someone with a hollow head
New Kids, Minogue
All those sort of rogues
Making lots of money for those scheming little toads
Then you come to us and say we made the music worse
Look at the Beatles and Stones
Who made their music first?

All the threes and all the queen bees
Singing 'does the driver wanna wee wee?'
Wicked ladies, malicious intent
Your honor, I was only trying to pick it up for lent
Does the driver wanna wee wee?
Does the driver wanna wee wee?
Does the driver wanna wee wee?
'Cause we want to wee wee too!
[Verse 3]
Why waste change, why change the habit
If the girl's got to have it, then the girl's got to have it
Easiest pickings
Wall to wall
In England's piped ceramic malls
By the dickens and the Devil's daughter
Bingo, full house everyone's a winner
The lady works in mysterious ways
All because the lady loves Christmas every day

[Chorus]
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
(You can make a living
Sometimes plundering)

You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
You sometimes plunder, and you sometimes plunder
(You can make a living
Sometimes plundering)

(Too late)

Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs