Welcome to Never Mind The Ballots. The phone lines are now open. If you'd like
To put a question to the candidates the number to ring is 0532779463

You want jobs? I've got jobs!
Hospitals? Top of my list!
Tax cuts and platform shoes
For every small businessman
Just give me your vote
Just give me your vote
Schools, prisons? Of course we'll build them!
Condoms for the American GIs!
Nuclear reactors breed like rabbits
Police oppression? You can have it, sir!
Just give me your vote
Put your cross in the box

Hello, we've got our first caller. Your name's Martin. Hello Martin. You disagree with our statement policy
Well, Martin, to tell you the truth, I couldn't agree with you more It's outrageous, disgusting
But unlike my colleague on my right, we're the party who say what we do, do what we say. You can bank on us Mart!

Good evening, Shirley. I'm so glad that you've rung. The matter is as dear to me as it is to you. Give me four years and I'll get right down to it
Because
Unlike my little balding colleague on my left, we don't make promises we can't Keep
You still there, Martin? Just one more thing. Give us your vote

You want houses? See me afterwards
Want my autograph? See my bodyguard
Pre-election budget handouts
You want a war? No problem!
Just give me your vote
Just give me your vote