[Verse 1]
Please, come over to 81st Street I'm in the apartment above the bar
You know you can't miss it, it's across from the subway and the tacky store with the Mylar scarves
My skin's as pale as the outdoors moon, my hair is silver like a Tiffany watch
I like lots of people around me but don't kiss hello and please don't touch
It's a Czechoslovakian custom my mother passed on to me
"The way to make friends, Andy, is invite them up for tea"
Open house, open house

[Verse 2]
I've got a lot of cats, here's my favorite, she's a lady called Sam
I made a paper doll of her, you can have it, that's what I did when I had St. Vitus dance
It's a Czechoslovakian custom my mother passed on to me
Give people little presents so they'll remember me
Open house, open house

[Verse 3]
Someone bring the vegetables, someone please bring heat
My mother showed up yesterday, we need something to eat
I think I got a job today, they want me to draw shoes
The ones I drew were old and used, they told me "Draw something new"
Open house, open house

[Verse 4]
Fly me to the moon, fly me to a star
But there are no stars in the New York sky, they're all on the ground
You scared yourself with music, I scared myself with paint
I drew 550 different shoes today, it almost made me faint
Open house, open house
Open house, open house