Fight to the death for the last slice of pizza
You've gotta want it more than him
Fight to the death for the last pizza slice
It's time to make a stand

You've gotta punch him in the face
Then he punches you in the face back
Then you punch him in the face once again
And it makes him madder
And he punches you in the face back
And then you punch him in the face yet again
Then you punch each other continuously

Look at this guy
He thinks he knows karate
But he doesn't know karate
You've gotta put him in his place
With your fist or maybe a kick in the dick
Yeah, now maybe stomp his ribs and liver
Oh, fuck! That totally backfired
Now he's coming for you
What'chu gonna do?
And something other funny thing...

It's gone to the ground like UFC
But it's really pretty damn boring
They're just lying there holding each other
It's technical and not exciting to watch
Punch!
Knee strike!
Jab!
Kidney punch!
Eye gouge!
Wet Willy!
Elbow drop!
Potato chips!

And he's up and moving again
Now it's exciting again
What is he gonna do next?
He's gonna play a guitar solo!

Holy shit! He's got a pointy stick
He's gonna try to stab you with the pointy stick
Don't take that shit! You've gotta form a defense
The only option now left is to hit him with a truck

Fight to the death for the last can of beer!
Fight to the death for the last toilet paper!
Fight to the death 'cause a dish in the sink!
Fight to the death to see who gets the mail!
Fight to the death to see who gets to fight Alex to the death!
Fight to the death!
Fight to the death over various stuff!