[Verse 1]
When I was young, my father taught me
Not to gloat
If I came home too proud of myself
I'd get wrestled to the floor and choked
But I forgive him for that
He was an eighth grade dropout and I was being a brat
I forgive him, I do
I know that he loves me and he knows I love him, too
When I was young, my father told me
"To each his own"
The lady said as she kissed the cow
"Some like the fiddle, some like the trombone"
And I live by that rule
Your trip is your trip, and my trip is my trip, too
Yeah, I'll mind my own business
I'll have an O'Douls and my friend here will have a Guinness

[Chorus]
I love my dad (I love my dad)
I love my dad (I love my dad)
I love my dad (I love my dad)
I love my dad

[Verse 2]
Your kid goes to the private Berkeley school
With one Black kid
My kid goes to the public school
Came home with a cracked rib
And when my kid's eighteen
He'll be out there like I was, probably chasing his dreams
And when your kid's twenty-two
He'll have an internship at a law firm, and hey, that's okay, too
When I was five, I came home from kindergarten crying
'Cause they sat me next to an albino
My dad said, "Son, everyone's different
You gotta love 'em all equally, you know"
And then, my dad sat me down
He said, "You gotta love all people, pink, red, Black, or brown"
And then, just after dinner
He played me the album They Only Come Out at Night by Edgar Winter
[Verse 3]
When I was young, my dad taught me
The beauty of patience
We'd go and hang with his friend, Billy Brislin
All day in his Steubenville basement
We'd watch wrestling matches on TV
And Billy couldn't move 'cause he was handicapped
And I learned to shoot the shit
And how to care for those in need and to show respect
When I was a kid, my dad brought home a guitar
He got from Sears
I took lessons from a neighbor lady
But it wasn't going anywhere
He went and got me a good teacher
And in no time at all, I was getting better
I can play just fine
I still practice a lot, but not as much as Nels Cline

[Guitar Solo]

[Verse 4]
When I was young my dad told me
To pay gossip no mind
"When people talk bad on you
You gotta flick it off your shoulder like a fly
Learn to pick your punches
Don't get no tussles or dead-end ditches
Life is short, young man
Get out there and make the best of it while you can"
I ain't trying to say my dad
Was some kind of a perfect saint
When something set him off, I hit the floor
Quicker than what Mike Tyson did to Ricky Spain
I hit the floor so fast
But that was so long ago, and we both moved past it
My life is pretty good
I owe it to him, my dad did the best he could
[Chorus]
I love you dad
I love you dad
I love you dad
I love you dad