[Verse 1]
I'm waving my dick in the wind
I'm waving my dick in the wind
If it all goes right, I'll be in your arms tonight
But I'm waving my dick in the wind

[Verse 2]
I'm lost in the sauce once again
I'm lost in the sauce once again
If I make it through the night, everything will be alright
But I'm lost in the sauce once again

[Bridge]
It's been ninety-seven days since I laid my head beside you
And a million miles of highway in-between
There's some red and blue lights that are shining right behind me
And that pig's pretty mean, bastard

[Verse 3]
You should have seen old Jimmy Wilson dance
You should have seen old Jimmy Wilson dance
Give that boy a dime, and you could have a chance
To see old Jimmy Wilson dance

[Bridge]
(Dance, Jimmy
I'm doin' the best I can, right there
That's it
You know, I can't really dance like I used to. I mean I'll try, but I'm an old, old man now)
I've got a real good feeling 'bout old Jimmy Wilson
Sure enough, he's got what it takes
Do another number for me, please won't you, Jimmy?
Cause you're a real good dancer
(Ooh, yeah, cut me down!)

[Verse 1 reprise]
I'm waving my dick in the wind (aa-oo-aa)
I'm waving my dick in the wind (aa-oo-aa)
If it all goes right, I'll be in your arms tonight
But I'm waving my dick in the wind
Waving my dick in the wind
I'm waving my, dick in the wind