[Intro One: The Education of Sonny Carson]
'What they gives you, blood?'
'Three months, man.'
'Whatchu doin in here anyway? You oughta be home with your momma. How old are you boy?'
'Thirteen.'
'Thirteen? Damn, the bastards must be runnin' outta n***as to arrest.'
[Verse 1: Kur]
Check, my life fucked up
Can't complain a lot of times I done fucked up
Had tough luck, I ain't have enough love
Plenty nights I went to sleep ain't have enough grub
Or I ain't eat at all
N***as couldn't live my life
Nowhere to go, sleeping outside I did that twice
No toilet paper, used socks, did that some nights
What the fuck did I do make me live so trife
I need heat at night
My stomach growl it wake me up, how I sleep at night
The wet aroma in the air, how I breathe at night
Everything that's in the dark gon see that light
So Imma see that light
I wanted to walk just like you
Wanted to talk just like you
Wanted to smoke wet and dip Ports, just like you
Heard you fuckin n***as for money, c'mon that's not you
Damn, I really hope that that's not true
I know Jamie feel left out too
I gotta be her brother, her father, I gotta step up too
Sometimes I rather see you dead, than to see you alive
I hate you, cause most the times you was the reason I cried
Most of the times you was the reason that I hated myself
On my own, can't wait to say I made it myself
When I was down and needed you, you never came to give help
You should be ashamed of yourself
But I ain't pointing fingers
Man what happened to my mom, you like a fucking stranger
But I still love you more than life, and I can't fucking change it
Just know I got us, we'll be good when I get fucking famous
When I get fucking famous
It's like God don't care
It's like some nights I can't call on him
I don't trust a soul, even my mom called the law on me
Told them I was trapping, that's the night I had jars on me
Why you wanna see your only son with a charge on him
[Verse 2: Dot]
Dear mom, I used to blame you for the time you missed
But just know I still love you
And dear daddy, for some years you had a n***a sick
But just know I still love you
Cause my struggle only made me stronger
I made it through the abuse, through the tears, through the hunger
I remember nights when I couldn't sleep
Hoping you would finally come around and tell me you could take me home
But that was only but a dream, no reality in sight
A lot of times I wanted to end my life, but I kept the pushing
I was truly just a lost soul
No love, didn't even have a stable place to call home
When I looked in the mirror I seen a blank face
And in my heart I can really feel it crying
A lot of deep emotion, a lot of things that I was feeling
Wondering how the fuck could you leave your son alone
In these places where these people only cared about a check
And had me eating grease out the bottom of the pan
And them fresh ass whoopings when you jumping out the tub
You know the one with the baby oil rubbed all on the belt
And I was only five
I used to wish ya would've fucking saved me
Would've held me tight and raised me like your baby
Would've been around and watched me grow into a man
But Im older now, I'm in the world, and now I understand