[Intro: Violent J]
"Looking for some special candy, are you?"
"You know it."
"Perhaps some bad candy? Hmm?"
"Hell yeah"
"Maybe some of them two shot chew pops? With enough punch to blow rude tops out they poop box?"
"Uh huh"
"Them cherry-dipped missiles are dandy, man. Who's equipped to get shit loads? The candy man!"
"Who?"

[Chorus: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
Two scoops, goosebumps, mud stumps, tombstones
Fruit juice, loose lumps, fudge chunks, scoop cones
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get that fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man
My variety of flavor depends on your paper
So if you can afford it, Candy can import it
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get that fetty ready quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick

[Verse 1: Shaggy 2 Dope]
I gives a shit what you crave or how you choose to misbehave
Create a fuckin' sex slave or fill your tenth grave
Need a Pez dispenser, a Ruger with the sensor
Need a box of Red Hots, Glocks with the red dots
Come up with the cheddar, I'm runnin' through the dark web
Ain't shit too hard to get, I'll ship your sweetheart's head
If the plastic come apart, the box is comin' dark red
Even though a part bled, it's well worth the charge bread
You lookin' for them snap cappers or them loud poppers?
I'll get you crowd stoppers, or them silent cop droppers
Some shit that'll breach the vest of ATF coppers
Even reach defense in urgent ghetto bird choppers
Got them popcorn top uniform heart stoppers
Big shop pig pop and fuckin' wig floppers
Got them suckers and yuckers and fuckin' truffles and puckers
And hip hop for your hots blowin' through you mother fuckers
[Chorus: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
Two scoops, goosebumps, mud stumps, tombstones
Fruit juice, loose lumps, fudge chunks, scoop cones
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man
My variety of flavor (Flavor) depends on your paper (Paper)
So if you can afford it (Money) Candy can import it (What money?)
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man

[Verse 2: Shaggy 2 Dope]
*Gulp* It's sticky, yummy, gooey, chewy, tasty, and delicious
Here for your darkest, sickest, vicious, twisted wishes
Would you like my sugar sticky? Give my dick a licky
I choke bitches while fuckin' them, all bruises, ho, no hickies
Try my candy-coated roofies, got them loosies Cosby uses
Loose screws, chewy juices, uses, and excuses
I got annual manuals, teach you pantyhose strangle holds
Got you yankable ankle bolts or your hangable bangables
Try my edible deadables, have 'em readably spreadable
I got federal medicals, she give head [?] bendable
Trinkets and devices, what you think, and be precisive
Candy can meet your demands if you can meet with Candy's prices
Holla holla holla holla scooby doobie pooper scoop
Fresh and fruity, pull up roll-up, hold up, blow up juicy fruit
Hoops, loops, fruits, scoops, fudge chunks, poop chutes
I double popped them troubled cops and bopped them out they blue boots
[Chorus: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
Two scoops, goosebumps, mud stumps, tombstones
Fruit juice, loose lumps, fudge chunks, scoop cones
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man
My variety of flavor (Flavor) depends on your paper (Paper)
So if you can afford it (Money) Candy can import it (What money?)
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man

[Bridge: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
Booger sugar, blue dots, red pops
Who gots all and more? The Candyman
Power dips, pink chew, sour lips
Who's your link to all and more? The Candyman
Booger sugar, blue dots, red pops
Who gots all and more? The Candyman
Power dips, pink chew, sour lips
Who's your link to all and more? The Candyman
Booger sugar, blue dots, red pops
Who gots all and more? The Candyman
Power dips, pink chew, sour lips
Who's your link to all and more? The Candyman

[Chorus: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
Two scoops, goosebumps, mud stumps, tombstones
Fruit juice, loose lumps, fudge chunks, scoop cones
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man
My variety of flavor (Flavor) depends on your paper (Paper)
So if you can afford it (Money) Candy can import it (What money?)
I'm the candy man, got your candy, man
Get your fetty ready quick, I'll have it handy, man