"dear Parrot, i love you so deeply and true"
Said Reggie destroyed and upset
"dear Cuddles, my darling, oh what shall i do?"
Said Dinky, your kinky love-pet

"dear Bonbon your chicken lies dead in the fridge"
"dear Porky, i ache for your touch"
"dear Dishy i'll meet you on Battersea Bridge"
"dear Bonny come back to our hutch"

And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter

"dear Stinky, i miss your silly old pongs"
From Beaky, who hungers for fun
"dear Saucy i offer redundant regards"
Said Lucky who hasn't had none

Said Nonscene; "i've had it right up to my ears"
From Fiery who never grows cold
"oh gosh, how i love you, i tell you no lies"
Said Harley, before i'm too old

And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter

"dear Parrot, i love you so deeply and true"
Said Reggie destroyed and upset
"dear Cuddles, my darling, oh what shall i do?"
Said Dinky, your kinky love-pet

"dear Bonbon your chicken lies dead in the fridge"
"dear Porky, i ache for your touch"
"dear Dishy i'll meet you on Battersea Bridge"
"dear Bonny come back to our hutch"

And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter

And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter
And i hope this letter will make things better
I hope you get a red letter