I'm an Irish cripple, a Scottish jew
I'm the blackmail man
A raspberry ripple, a buckle-my-shoe
I'm the blackmail man
I'm a dead fish coon, a pikey Greek
I'm the blackmail man
A silvery spoon, a bubble and squeak
I'm the blackmail man

Well, i'm the blackmail man and I know what you do
Every one of you, i'm the blackmail man
You make me sick, make me Tom and Dick
I'm the blackmail man
Blackmail man

I'm a Paki, Chink a half-cocked ponce
I'm the blackmail man
A tiddly -wink, a Charlie Ronce
I'm a no socks tramp, a cavalier drunk
I'm the blackmail man
A paraffin lamp, an elephants trunk
I'm the blackmail man

I'm the blackmail man and I know what you do
Every one of you, blackmail man
I hate your guts, your Newington Butts
I'm the blackmail man
Hampton wick, Parrafin lamp
Fraiser and Nash, Pony and trap
Blackmail man
Up your harris, in your mince
Hamptons don't leave fingerprints
I am the blackmail man