I interviewed Leslie Howard
I interviewed Noël Coward
I interviewed the great Stravinsky
But my greatest achievement
Is the interview I had
With the star who worked for Minsky
I met her at the Yankee Clipper
And she didn't unzip one zipper
I said "Miss Lee, you are such an artist
Tell me why you never miss
What do you think of while you work?"
And she said, "While I work
My thoughts go something like this."

Zip! Walter Lippmann wasn't brilliant today
Zip! Will Saroyan ever write a great play?
Zip! I was reading Schopenhauer last night
Zip! and I think that Schopenhauer was right

I don't want to see Zarina
I don't want to meet Cobina
Zip! I'm an intellectual
I don't like a deep contralto
Or a man whose voice is alto
Zip! I'm an heterosexual
Zip! I took intellect to master my art
Zip! Who the hell is Margie Hart
Zip, Toscanini leads the greatest of bands
Zip, Jergens Lotion does the trick for his hands
Zip, Rip Van Winkle on the screen would be smart
Zip, Tyrone Power will be cast in the part

I have read the great Cabala
And I simply worship Allah
Zip, I am just a mystic
I don't care for Whistler's mother
Charley's aunt or Schubert's brother
Zip, I'm misogynistic

Zip, my intelligence is guiding my hand
Zip, who the hell is Sally Rand?