(Verse)
It's really a wonderful job
For fellows like George, Abe, and me, too
It's great to shake hands with the mob
And to hold every kid on your knee, too
Ev'ry word that I speak goes in the headlines;
When I speak, all the papers hold their deadlines
But I've found a way of dropping a hint
Or a glint
Of the truth that the boys cannot print
For instance
For instance

(Chorus 1)
When I was only a governor and just a good-time Charlie
A certain party came to me - he said his name was Farley
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
He sat right down and talked to me till i was in a stupor
And ended up by selling me the works of Fenimore Cooper
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
I said, "You're quite a salesman; you've been sent here by the fates
If you can sell these dreary books which ev'rybody hates
Then maybe you can sell me the whole United States!"
But that's off the record

(Chorus 2)
My messages to the Congress are a lot of Boola-boola
I'm not so fond of Bankhead, but I'd love to meet Tallulah
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
I sit up in my bedroom reading books like Silas Marner,
And Sears and Roebuck catalogues to get away from Garner
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
If i'm not re-elected and worst comes to the worst
I'll never die of hunger and I'll never die of thirst
I've got one boy with DuPont and another one with Hearst
But that's off the record
(Chorus 3)
When I go up to Hyde Park, it's not just for the ride there
It's not that I love Hyde Park, but I love to park and hide there
Don't print that - It's strictly off the record
Oh, sing a song of Boulder Dam, but what's a little song worth?
We'll use it to throw razor blades, and maybe Alice Longworth
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
And now I'd like to talk about some folks I used to know -
Mr. John L. Lewis and his famous C.I.O
"Frankie and Johnnie were sweethearts"
But that's off the record

(Chorus 4)
My speeches on the radio have made me quite a hero
I only have to say "My friends," and stocks go down to zero
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
The radio officials say that I'm the leading fellow
Jack Benny can be President and I'll go on for Jell-O
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
It's pleasant at the White House, but I'll tell you how I feel:
The food is something terrible - just sauerkraut and veal
If Eleanor would stay at home, I'd get a decent meal
But that's off the record

(Movie Chorus)
When I was courting Eleanor, I told her uncle Teddy
I wouldn't run for president unless the job was steady
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
We entertained the royalty, but we were never flustered
We gave them Yankee hot dogs with Colman's English mustard
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
I sit up in my study writing gags for Mr. Ickes
And insults for the gentlemen who'd like to slip him mickeys
Don't print it - It's off the record
I scrapped the Prohibition Act when we required a bracer
And finished up the Boulder Dam to give the boys a chaser
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
And for my friends in Washington who complain about the taxes
Who cares as long as we cannot be axed out of the Axis?
Don't print it - It's strictly off the record
I can't forget how Lafayette helped give us our first chance
To win our fight for liberty, and now they've taken France
We'll take it back from Hitler and put ants in his Japants
And that is for the record