[David Morrison]
"There is no threat to Earth in 2012
All the talk about a doomsday is a big hoax"

[Robert Foster]
Hello, I'm Robert Foster, your faithful host
Streaming another episode on the frequency of Juice News
Infused with a healthy dose of sanity
Good morning, viewers, tune in, gather round as we delve
Into a Rap News update for the year 2012
We report that the world wide ebb and flow of history is now plain and evident:
Occupations have stormed fortress Walls, with-in-tents and taken up residence;
Leaks and revelations have led to revolutions, a deluge of ferment
Ladies and gentlemen, if 2011 was a prelude, a portent
Of things to come, then it's dramatically clear we're in for a massive year
And to interpret these interesting times, we have General Baxter here
But we'll start with our resident expert, Terrence Moonseed
Terrence, what does this year mean as you see it?

[Terrence Moonseed]
Oh, Boy! 2012 on the News Feed
You'd better listen up, Robert, cause I got a lot of phenomenal knowledge and I wanna be dropping it
Finally the news is choosing to report truth on a proper topic! You'll never stop me from hollering
Brace yourselves, cos I'm getting ready to send in the requisite academic medicine, heaven-sent
Querulent evidence, never settling when I'm grabbing a hammer and smashing the Nephilim
This is the time for humanity's ascension
The fifth sunset in line with precession and the Mayans' calendar prediction
On December 21, this world will rise in unison
From its prison into the fifth dimension and the highest of wisdom
But as we'll see, it's the catalyst for a whole catalog of catastrophes
Calamities, as we reach the Terrencendental McKennical singularity

[Robert Foster]
What will all this mean for the fate of humanity?

[Terrence Moonseed]
It means the fiends that seek to deceive and keep us weak'll reach a state of apogee
And it means that people cease the capacity for endless atrophy
That as a planet we rise from apathy and challenge the Draconian powers-that-be

[Robert Foster]
Who are they?

[Terrence Moonseed]
Aliens, parasites, they're among us, keeping us trapped in captivity
[Robert Foster]
General, your say?

[General Baxter]
Now, I don't know what planet he's inhabiting
But what the hippy is saying is accurate; forget the wacky analogy
Look around at the world, and you'll see it's already actually happening
Right here on Earth, where human slaves are trying to rise
To take on the great elite,and take to the streets world-wide
Against corporate entities which have taken on human form

[Robert Foster]
Protesting in New York, Portland, Spain, Greece and distant Melbourne

[General Baxter]
Tent monster morons, homos, drummers, drug addicted freaks

[Robert Foster]
They say they're protesting to demand justice, and dignity

[General Baxter]
Seriously? I read in The New York Times quite the contrary
They lack clear demands, they just want to live for free and get sympathy
In fact the only clear demand they've ever made
Is for some pepper spray in the effing face
Then they bitch and complain
But it's just a food product, essentially. I take it daily
With my favourite drink: Bloody Mili-tary
[Robert Foster]
Hmm. perhaps speaking directly with the protesters would be wiser
So we now cross live to Liberty Plaza; hello?

[Anonymous]
Hello, fellow citizens of the world wide web
We're Livestreaming Global Revolution direct in hi-tech

[Robert Foster]
The precariat is revolting, what can we expect to happen next?

[Anonymous]
Let me get on the human megaphone, yo, mic check (Mic check)
The ninety nine percent (ninety nine percent)
Have one demand to present (present)
Expressed clear (expressed clear)
The regime of alien corporations ends here

[Robert Foster]
Are you the leader?

[Anonymous:]
No. We are a movement of free thinkers
Without hierarchical structure (we're a movement of free thinkers--)
Shut up!

[Robert Foster]
I've got to ask if you're for free information, why the mask?

[Anonymous]
Because I am but an idea, whose time has arrived at last
And you can shoot a person, but ideas are bulletproof

[General Baxter]
Huh! prove it's true!

[Anonymous]
As you wish...
We are Anonymous
We are legion
We do not forgive
We do not... umm.. what was it?
I know it... We do not forgive, we do not...
(Forget!) oh, yeah
Expect us

[Robert Foster]
General? Terrence? Could this be the global shift that will avert apocalypse?

[General Baxter]
Nonsense. - Although, I admit, I'm pro #Occupying policies

[Robert Foster]
Wait, I expected you to say that #Occupy should cease...

[General Baxter]
Cease?! We've been #Occupying for centuries, on land, sky and seas
We #Occupied North America, #Australia and #Hawai'i
And if you've forgotten, it's 'cause we also #OccupyHistory
Our buddies have #OccupiedTerritories; we've #OccupiedAfghanistan and Iraq
And this year's plan is to hashtag #OccupyIran

[Terrence Moonseed]
Pah, wars and invasions, that's what people are #Occupying against!

[General Baxter]
If you've benefitted from #Occupation, then you're in the 1%
But why stop there? 2012 is a time of attainment
First we'll #OccupytheElection and the next President's brainstem
And as soon as Earth is spent, we'll #OccupytheMoon, with spaceships
Then #Mars, and then we'll brutally #OccupyUranus

[Terrence Moonseed]
Heinous! The only planet we actually have to worry about is Nibiru!

[General Baxter & Robert Foster]
Nibiwho?

[Terrence Moonseed]
Nibiru! The Planet X of fear and doom
It's due to smash right into our system

[General Baxter & Robert Foster:]
Oh!

[Terrence Moonseed]
Causing mass extinction

[General Baxter & Robert Foster]
Whoah!

[Terrence Moonseed]
Bi-polar shifting

[Robert Foster]
So, is this fact or Science Fiction?

[Terrence Moonseed]
No! it's Zachariah Sitchin who decrypted Sumerian myths
And showed that we were cloned to mine gold by alien illuminati

[Robert Foster]
We are the slaves of aliens?

[Terrence Moonseed]
Yes! The Annunaki!
And they're coming soon!

[General Baxter]
No, we're coming and we'll #OccupyNibiru, too!

[Robert Foster]
I'm confused... are we the aliens? And if that's true
Are we due to spread peace or war throughout the Milky Way?

[Terrence Moonseed]
We'll bring love and light

[General Baxter]
We'll bring pepper spray

[Robert Foster]
Well, dear viewers it's probable
That getting consensus on this issue is impossible
Therefore we went to call on the honourable, venerable, Great Oracle
O Prophet, Seer, All-Knowing Chomsky
Thank you for manifesting here

[Noam Chomsky]
No problem

[Robert Foster]
We seek your sage advice and better wisdom
For instance, how can we stop terrorism?

[Noam Chomsky]
There's a simple method

[Robert Foster]
What is it?

[Noam Chomsky]
Just stop participating in it

[Robert Foster]
So which in your opinion is the most significant threat to world peace?

[Noam Chomsky]
Our ignorance

[Robert Foster]
I see, and how can we defeat this at last?

[Noam Chomsky]
Turn off your TVs for a start

[Robert Foster]
The media at large do seem to paralyse
Hypnotically, divide, distract, and atomise
And cause us to be brainwashed and servile
Your thoughts?

[Noam Chomsky]
That's not controversial

[Robert Foster]
Well, we should thank you, O Oracle
For guiding and leading us

[Noam Chomsky]
Not at all, Robert
But I'm no oracle or leader
I'm just a linguistics teacher

[Robert Foster]
Alas, the time has arrived to end this episode; much is left to be known
But we'll strive to analyse events as 2012 unfolds:
Will we see Aliens, popular awakening, mass insurrection?
Divine intervention or, who knows... maybe even a true democratic election?
We'd settle for any one of them! For this grand human experiment
Seems to be sleepwalking towards a social, ecological and existential reckoning
And with GM seeds in the soil, droids deployed, peak oil threatening
This year's headline: will we avoid the precipice, or dive off the edge of it
Whatever your preference, creed, conspiracy or party membership
Our fate could depend on what we want "2012" to represent
This date that we've subconsciously identified
As our collective, self-imposed deadline for correcting our way of life
With so much energy aligned on this point in time
With all that we are, and could be, potentially on the line
Could this be our final meeting point, prior to the rising or turning of the tide?
The clock is already ticking, see you next time--
On the other side