Are you sitting comfortably?
Good! Then we'll begin... (spoken)

There was a crooked man
And he walked a crooked mile
He had a crooked stick
And oh boy how it cramped his style
Well did ya mamma ever tell ya
Them kooky little nurs 'ry rhymes
Jack and Jill went up the hill
Supposed to get some water
They stayed up there a long time
Doing what they shouldn't ought-a
Did ya mamma ever tell ya
Them funky little nurs' ry rhymes

And when you got a little older
Did you learn to read between the lines

What did ya mamma ever tell ya
'bout the A's and B's and C's
Did she ever tell ya
'bout the birds and the bees
Did ya mamma ever tell ya
You were brought by the stork
And how you could run before you could walk?
Mary had a little lamb, his feet were black as coal
He even followed her to bed
The naughty little soul
Did ya Mamma ever tell ya
Them kooky little nurs'ry rhymes
Little Jackie Horner sitting quite in his corner
How'd he get that name
Doing what he shouldn't ought-a
Did ya mamma ever tell ya
Them funky little nurs' ry rhymes

And as you got a little older
Did you learn to read between the lines

What did ya mamma ever tell ya
'bout the A's and B's and C's
Did she ever tell ya
'bout the birds and the bees
Did ya mamma ever tell ya
You were brought by the stork
And how you could run before you could walk?

How about that oldie lady who was living in a shoe
She had so many children
She knew how and what to do
Oh did ya mamma ever tell ya
Them funky little nurs' ry rhymes
And when you got a little older
Did you learn to read between the lines

What did ya mamma ever tell ya
'bout the A's and B's and C's
Did she ever tell ya
'bout the birds and the bees
Did ya mamma ever tell ya
You were brought by the stork
How you could run, how you could run
How you could run before you could walk yeah !