Ask me how do I feel
Ask me now that we're cozy and clinging
Well sir, all I can say
Is if I were a bell I'd be ringing

From the moment we kissed tonight
That's the way I've just gotta behave
Boy, if I were a lamp I'd light
Or if I were a banner I'd wave

Ask me how do I feel, little me with my quiet upbringing
Well sir, all I can say is if I were a gate I'd be swinging
And if I were a watch I'd start popping my springs
Or if I were a bell I'd go ding dong, ding dong, ding

Ask me how do I feel
From this chemistry lesson I'm learning
Well sir, all I can say
Is if I were a bridge I'd be burning

Yes, I knew my moral would crack
From the wonderful way that you looked
Boy, if I were a duck I'd quack
Or if I were a goose I'd be cooked

Ask me how do I feel, ask me now that we're fondly caressing
Well, if I were a salad I know I'd be splashing my dressing
Or if I were a season, I'd surely be spring
Well, if I were a bell I'd go ding dong, ding dong, ding