[Verse 1]
[Brian Matthew] The next few minutes, we're in the lap of the gods and the hands of the Beatles In my young days, when I was a lad, they used to have actors in films and now that they--
[Paul] Yes?
[John] Hey! Listen!
[Paul] It's all changed, now, Brian They're not doing that, no actors
[John] It's all changed, now
[Brian] But this is what I wonder In those days, the actors used to say their best bits were left on the cutting room floor, did you find that?
[John] No, no, no, those were the good bits in the film You should have seen the rest


[Verse 2]
[Brian] Yes?
[John] Rubbish!
[Brian] Was it, really?
[John] Even worse, yes
[Brian] Who was worst?
[John] Oh, Paul
[Brian] I see
[Paul] I think John was about the worst
[John] No, it was you

[Verse 3]
[Paul] Oh, Ringo was very good, he was, he's a good lad
[Brian] He was. They're saying he's a new Charlie Chaplin Do you think that's right?
[John] He was miming
[Paul] You, too, with Jason
[John] Oh, yes, he's an old one. Okay, Ring?
[Brian] Beginning to look like that Now, then--
[Ringo] All right, John. Can you hear me?
[Verse 4]
[Paul] Can you hear him? Hello!
[Brian] Not really I hope not I hope not!
[John] We brought you the flowers, Ring
[Brian] He's not allowed to talk
[Ringo] Eh?
[John] We brought you the flowers

[Verse 5]
[Ringo] Oh, good
[John] And the grapes
[Ringo] Oh, I like grapes
[Paul] He likes grapes
[George] We've been to Portugal
[Brian] Guess who's, guess who's top of the pops in Portugal, then


[Verse 6]
[All] Who?
[Brian] Os Beatles
[John] Los Beatles? Great, great laugh
[Brian] Ridiculous, Os Beatles
[Brian] I don't suppose you know the title of your film in Portuguese?
[John] No Crinsk dee Night?
[Brian] Could be, let's hear the number, shall we?
[John] Right