[George IV (Howick)]
I'm George IV, the regent king
Which means I was just standing in
Acting king because my dad
George III had gone barking mad

[George III (Lewin)]
Banana!

[George IV]
Great palaces I did design
Buckingham was one of mine
Art and fashion, I so rated

[George III]
And wives?

[George IV]
That's more complicated

[Chorus]
Actresses and duchesses
The great loves of my life
I loved more girls than I ate pies
But I couldn't stand my wife
(He couldn't stand his wife)
Go away!
[George IV]
I only married Queen Caroline
When my debts began to climb
'Cause if I agreed to tie the knot

[George III]
I said I'd pay off the lot

[George IV]
But the wedding caused all sorts of strife
'Cause I already had a wife

[George III]
A divorced Catholic?

[George IV]
Dad did sigh
But the mad old goat just wouldn't die

[George III]
Still here
Oh, spoke too soon!

[George IV]
At last, I can go solo!
As true king, my reign began
Though I was now older than your nan
And as the ruler of our nation
I banned my wife from my coronation
And knowing now that I did hate her
She promptly died just three weeks later
But all those pies that I got through
Meant ten years later, I died too
[George III]
Hello, have we met?
I'm a kangaroo!

[Chorus]
Actresses, duchesses
The great loves of my life
I loved more girls than I ate pies
But I couldn't stand my wife

[Outro]
I had just ten years on the throne
Do you remember that?
No, all that you remember is...
I was really fat