[HENRY VII (Baynton)]
Of all the kings called Henry
I'm the one you've rarely heard
Shakespeare wrote four, five, six, eight
But seven not a word
People think I'm dreary
To some extent I am
But look a little closer
Glam, bam, thank you, mam!

I didn't agree with King Richard three,
So I fought him at Bosworth Field and won, victory!
How cool does it sound that I'm the king who found
Richard's crown in a hedge on the winning battle ground
The only way to end war and avert further disaster
There's got to be a way to unite York and Lancaster

I'm the original ch-ch-ch Tudor
Founder of that dynasty
The man who closes the Wars of the Roses
That's right, that's right, that's me!

I launched attacks on lords who earned stacks
Mine was a noble cause to tap them all for tax
They paid their share, was only fair
To make England rich and me a millionaire
Elizabeth York became my wife for life, that make me a bore?
Joined our family seats, that's neat, and made my rule secure
I'm the original ch-ch-ch Tudor
Returning power to the state
It seemed quite toothless but actually ruthless
I made the monarchy great

Spent a long time fighting pretenders to the throne
Lambert Simnel and Perkin Warbeck said my throne was their own
They claimed they'd been the princes,
in the tower their rule delayed
I said 'this crown ain't big enough for the three of us'
And had one slayed

I'm the original ch-ch-ch Tudor
King of foreign policy
To end hostile relations with enemy nations
I asked them a-make friends with me

Yeah, the original ch-ch-ch Tudor
They say dullness my main trait
Well, that's a sad endightment
'Cause if you're looking for excitement
My son was Henry VIII