(Here's one I got a lot of requests for)

My fingerprints are getting burned off
From using the too hot touchpad
Of my MacBook Pro
As I casually scroll through
The fetish-based forum
Of which I am an active member
I promise I will never stop overusing superlative words
(I think I skipped a line)
But I will never stop overusing superlative words
Like rad or awesome or neato

Because you always work on Thursday night
And I need something else to analyze
I'm making a fortune, painting you a portrait of the artist

While we're waiting for these updates to upload
Let me talk for just a minute about your use
Of the symbolic father figure
I haven't been outside since last week
When I went to the beach
Where I spent the whole time
Looking at the ocean wishing it was warmer
Where I spent the whole time
Looking for a stronger wireless signal
Because ciarrocci net only had two bars
And was very unreliable
Because you always work on Thursday night
And I need something else to analyze
I'm making a fortune, painting you a portrait of the artist

When I was a kid in elementary school
Or going into elementary school
There was a period of my life
When I was afraid of just about everything
I was afraid of the radio
I couldn't listen to the radio
So many of the songs just
Seemed like something off of an alien planet
I remember one song, by Aerosmith
Called "I Don't Want To Miss A Thing"
And it was-
There was this video that came with it
Where Steven Tyler's trapped in some space station, screaming to his daughter
Because it was a tie-in with the movie Armageddon
Which is about this giant asteroid
That's about to hit-hit the earth and destroy it
But there were a few songs that I liked on the radio
One of them went like this:

Every morning there's a halo hanging
From the corner of my girlfriend's four-post bed
I know it's not mine, but I'll see if I can use it for
The weekend or a one-night stand
Couldn't understand
How the word got out
Once again, as predicted, left my broken heart open
And you ripped it out
That one was on MTV all the time
Or how about...

My baby don't mess around
Because she loves me so
And this I know for sure
But does she really wanna
But can't stand to see me walk out the door?

That one was a little later

Because you always work on Thursday night
And I need something else to analyze
I'm making a fortune, painting you a portrait of the artist

Because you always work on Thursday night
And I need something else to analyze
I'm making a fortune, painting you a portrait of the artist

I don't want to destroy your tank top
Let's be friends and just walk away
It's good to see you lying there in your Superman skivvies
Lying on the floor, lying on the floor, I've come undone!