Tobuscus
Bioshock Infinite Literal Trailer
May contain content inappropriate for children
Irrational games with a spiky chess piece behind it

Darkness, bubbles, background lights up
Shadows become underwater treeeeeeeees
Swim through the see so faaaaast
Like the Ūsain Bolt of the sea
Or is it Üsain?

A big daddy
There's an underwater city
Sea monster

City lights up
It's a goldfish
Cameraman is shouting bubbles
Cameraman needs to come up for air

Much better, OR NOT!
Thrown, hit the ground
Blurry hand, look up
Ocean not so big. Big daddy not so big
THAT THING IS

Giant evil robot hand grabs your head
But he has a heart
Don't try to grab it or he'll throw you out the window!
Slow-motion lasts until you look down
So don't look down
DON'T LOOK DOWN! DON'T LOOK DOWN!
You're lucky there's a blimp
GRAB IT!

Hit it rolling backwards
There's a handle but it's too far away
HUH?! RIP THE BLIMP!
DON'T LOOK DOWN! WHY'D YOU LOOK DOWN?!
Now you've got one hand

Look around. Floating town
Tell a baby to talk to the hand
There's a man on the balcony talking to himself
Cue epic music

Floating building wants to be higher than the other ones
So it boosts itself
RIPPING NOISE?!
It's not looking good

Down he goes!
Onto a levitating nest of dethorned roses
Float into the arms of a buxom sorceress
Who's your daddy?
ME
Oh. My bad

That's a shame
She had an amazing pair of
Bioshock Infinite........s