Intro:
A shame it had to come to this. Tired of this bullshit. Nothing else I’ve done has made it clear. Let this make it abundantly so. Mm

Verse 1:
Wouldn’t stop when you stalked in the parking lot
Wouldn’t stop keeping me from pops when I was just a tot
All this threatening and tripping nonstop
Kept quiet all these years but now it’s time to let it pop
Hear a lotta talk about these deadbeat dads
Not a lotta talk about these deadbeat moms
About how they had a lot of money to spend on clothes, shoes it’s funny we were broke
Skinny as fuck but yeah you still loved me?
I ain’t no fucking dummy, it’s black and white
Were married and said you didn’t drink and yet you still fucked him
He was drunk
I proclaimed so were you too which you denied
You knew better, you fucked him just out of spite so I’m here
No longer regret, I’m just upset the first thing you were concerned bout was the connect
Lord knows how many drugs you did when I was inside
Lord knows how many times I attempted to hide
From all the ass whoopings I ain’t saying I was the perfect kid
I deserved more than you fucking up all them dicks
Had a different man, a different date
At least, minimum a week
If the n***a was weak, let’s get some more meat
Dropped me off to all these places, stopping off to the grocery store I can say that I hate it
From cigarettes to hella weed, blowing trees life sucked, easy to say my father did it
You kept it away
It hurts still even today
You see me acting different but here is the thing
You hurt people you know you gotta love with the pain
I’m saying. I’m feelin like you had nothing to gain
Just some bullshit about how we back at it again
Where’s that cane you had up in your trunk?
Shit, making Rori cry ain’t give a fuck
Shit. Single dose of Ritalin ain’t enough?
Shit. You think I ain’t call you on your fucking bluff?
Shit

Interlude 1:
What y’all thought I was just gonna lay down and take it?
Nah
I ain’t done
Far from it

Verse 2:
I ain’t saying everything you did was bad
Growing up you acted like I didn’t have a fucking dad
Like he wasn’t shit he paid child support
Couldn’t see me at birth
For money’s all that you felt that I was worth
For in-store more lore about how he tore
Up, our lives just the two of us
Scraping change for a few bucks
Struggling to make it, barely 5 to drive
In church waited in line to get food from the drive
Why? It’s black and white
He gave us that money
It’s funny, buying make-up
You like how they look at you honey?
Kasbah, hope it was worth it you blew me off
Donte died in the hospital the family we stood off
Bout to tear each other’s throats off
This shit is fucking weak I thought this shit is so soft
You let me see his momma not him or grandmama
All this drama imma fuck it up im your karma
I’m Honored to be apart of this situation
Against time I’m still racing
My face had condensation
All these women I’m embracing
My heart’s racing when I see you up in the parking lot
Stalking me questioned me I didn’t talk a lot
That meeting was to be a secret
Pops told me a lot of shit I couldn’t believe it
I was supposed to say I ate not hot dogs
But Alfredo, I said it wrong but really to top it off
They said they were watching you for a long
While
You needed a break (3:28)
Sometimes I wish in that accident it was your life to take
How do you sleep at night with all those decisions you made?
You got your mama turning down in her grave
I’m doing no better I hate
I had to give this all this effort
You know I can’t let it go so know I’m about to sever this connection
I pray to God to forgive me for wanting to see you rot I’m putting you on the spot I sought to talk after your loss of life
Final Monologue:
I always thought about what to say at your funeral and what not
I figured I gotta watch what I say cause I’mma get shot. I figured let’s not
Listen here. Listen good
I get it
I get you had some pain cause your mama died at 14. You had brothers that couldn’t give two shits about you and I saw that for myself
Then again I don’t know the full story about that
I just know you told me y’all were in a big ass fire and damned there blew up when y’all were little
I’m just trying to figure out where the disconnect was
You had to go to high school and befriend a girl named Sandra that let you in so you could have a family
What happened with that? A chick that let us stay in her place cause we damned there died from carbon monoxide poisoning. Thank God our neighbors up top with that Porsche called 911 and said something
Rumor is y’all had a falling out after 20-something years
Shit. I wonder why?
You know what I didn’t care about you fucking all them guys that much
I figured if I had video games and pizza that was what’s up. I cared I couldn’t see my father
I’m mad that I cried trying to sneak on the phone to talk to him and you snatched it away and hung up
I’m mad that you threw me off every which direction cause you couldn’t be my mom
You were my mother that wanted every got damned break she could take
I’m mad you got hella money from my dad and blew it on drugs and bullshit
Why did it take me getting left behind to take a trip to Disneyland for the second time? I don’t even remember the first
We lived life like we were poor. I had clothes but was skin to the bone and turned down benni Hanna’s because I preferred fucking China chef
You’re the reason for all of my pain and suffering
You are the reason I cried out of frustration cause I didn’t speak up against cause I loved you and thought you wouldn’t do me harm or wrong
I betrayed so many people for you
Pops had to take classes and you barely showed up. You cussed out every social worker. You planted lice on me and always took me to the emergency room instead of just regular taking me to the doctor
You drugged me up for money
You threw me at video games so I could forget about the shit that was happening
Court order was to call you every Tuesday and Thursday from a private number until I was grown. You’re the one that left me at child services overnight and had them call my pops and tell him either he gets custody of I’m going to a foster home
Yet tou stalked me and my neighborhood, hiring private investigators and friends to watch me and told every kid about how my dad is brainwashing me and how I’m ungrateful for what you’ve done. You constantly acted as if you were the good person. Hell I should have known you’d stalk me because you made me come with you to stalk my father
I didn’t want you at my basketball game
You showed up
I didn’t want to see you when you stopped as my brother and I crossed Iliff and yelled at me
You showed up
High school graduation I didn’t want to see you
You showed up
Living my life after, you showed up
And Mr. Davis I’m shouting you out because you’re gonna tell my mom I’m not going to school senior year even though she has history with cherry creek and we advised not to speak with her?
The fucking reason I didn’t show up to school is cause I didn’t give a fuck about myself and who do you think that was because of?
If you cared you would have called my dad plain and simple
To anyone else that has ever helped this woman out in stalking me, or has believed this bullshit about how my father and I aren’t shit stay far away from me. If you deal with her I don’t want to deal with you
To the Johnson family y’all shunned this woman instead of helping her with her mental illness. She went to a psychiatrist. Amy thank you lord knows what you had to deal with
But to the family y’all know what she did and was doing to me and let her do it. All of her friends and everyone involved know had to know and didn’t say a got damned thing
Sandy and Jamie and everyone else that helped get me free I can’t thank you enough and I’m so sorry that this evil person made you cry and lose sleep. Thank you
To you, Paula, Gina, Naj, Yolanda whatever you call yourself now. With all you put me and us through, be lucky that this is all you got. Take that how you want to
Having me scared that my pops, my brother, and myself would get shot and killed and then you dying in a final standoff with the police
You had me scared and in fear and humiliated damned there my whole life
You served your own son papers. You did me just how you did everyone else and have used everyone you have known. I hope God has mercy on your soul when it’s time cause Lord you have got it coming
It’s taken so much out of me. I forgive you though
I forgive you and I got love for you for being half the reason I’m here
The other half of the person you couldn’t be
I’ve tried to talk to you to ask you why but you can’t get past your own pride and nonsensical bullshit to say sorry
By the way folks a lot of this shit is public record so if you want to see yourself go search Denver, Arapahoe, and Adams counties and you’ll see
As far as this life is concerned. I never want to see you again
I forgive but I won’t forget
If you ever try to harm me and my loved ones, a lot of which have been scared of you as well
You’ll have to deal with your worst nightmare
I gotta let you and this situation go
I wish the best for you
Take care