Pras
Chinese Restaurant Skit
Customer: Yo, let's go to this next Chinese-Muslim joint. We could get some shrimp fried rice and make Salah at the same time

Customer: Aight, cool

Restaurant Guy: (Humming) (Sings) You are not alone ...

Customer: Ey yo, Ey yo Chang Wang, what's up

Restaurant Guy: I'll be right out. Right. Wait. One second. Okay, then. Fine. Your order

Customer: Lemme get, um, lemme get two of them beef fried rices over there. Lemme get a half a chicken wing. Don't put that little retarded leg in it --

Restaurant Guy: -- Right --

Customer: -- just cut that off. Don't put no onion in my white rice

Customer: Yo yo yo. I need four chicken wings fried hard and sh*t

Restaurant Guy: What's this? Hold on? What's this? The two of you? At once? Okay, then. You want beef

Customer: No no no, we want beef to eat. We got no beef

Customer: I want four chicken wings fried hard, n***a, what the f**k is you talking 'bout

Restaurant Guy: All right. I'll kick your monkey a**es my f**king self

Customer: Whoa whoa, what are you coming over the counter for?

Restaurant Guy: You think I open a restaurant in the middle of the hood and don't know what's going on? I f**king represent

Customer: I'll f**k you the f**k up

Restaurant Guy: I will avenge my brothers by representing and whooping your a**es, word is bond

Customer: This ain't Channel 5, n***a, somebody gonna die

Restaurant Guy: Okay, then. I will show you Flying Fist of Judah.

Customer: You ain't gonna show me sh*t

Restaurant Guy: That's right
Customer: I'll show you these nuts

Restaurant Guy: You and you

Customer: Straight from Mortal Kombat

Restaurant Guy: You're just talking. Obviously the two of you are just b*t*h-a** n***ers

Customer: N***a, well then do something, you talking all your bullsh*t

Customer: So what's up, so what's up?

Restaurant Guy: All right. This is a Chinese restaurant, but like Burger King, have it your way.

(Punching noises)

Customer: Ah! This n***a here ...