My Uncle Charlie is a cynical man
And his wifes a touch skeptical, too
They've got one of those stickers
In the back of their van; it says:
We've seen the prices at the zoo
Well today I knocked upon their door
And said that I was passing
And charlie launched a scathing attack
When I asked him what I'd done, he said
"You stupid bastard! We live in a cul-de-sac!"

Went to Dali's party; it was fancy dress
I just stuck an apple in my face
I saw a chap who obviously was out to impress
Reckoned he'd beat Gagarin into space
He said "Hi there boys!
Like I'm sorry I'm late!

But I was getting done up
As a Mogul Thrash acetate!"
Me, I got bored
So I went home
Got into bed
And came to the conclusion...

There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Birol
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
On a Saturday Night instead of going to a pub