How d'you do, I
See you've met my
Faithful handyman
He's just a little brought down because
When you knocked
He thought you were the candy man
Don't get strung out by the way that I look
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man by the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a lover
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania, ha ha
Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound
You look like you're both pretty groovy
Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie
I'm glad we caught you at home
Could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry (right!)
We'll just say where we are, then go back to the car
We don't want to be any worry
Well, you got caught with a flat, well, how about that?
Well, babies, don't you panic
By the light of the night, it'll all seem alright
I'll get you a satanic mechanic
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania, ha ha
Why don't you stay for the night?
Or maybe a bite?
I could show you my favorite obsession
I've been making a man
With blond hair and a tan
And he's good for relieving my tension
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania, ha ha
Hit it, hit it, I'm just a sweet transvestite (sweet transvestite)
From Transexual, Transylvania, ha ha
So, come up to the lab
And see what's on the slab
I see you shiver with antici-
-Pation
But maybe the rain
Is really to blame
So I'll remove the cause
But not the symptom