[Verse 1: Lol Creme]
I went to a party
At the local county jail
All the cons were dancing
And the band began to wail
But the guys were indiscreet
They were brawling in the street
At the local dance
At the local county jail

[Verse 2: Lol Creme]
Well the band were playing
And the booze began to flow
But the sound came over
On the police car radio
Down at Precinct 49
Having a tear-gas of a time
Sergeant Baker got a call
From the governor of the county jail

[Chorus: Lol Creme & Kevin Godley]
Load up, load up, load up
With rubber bullets
Load up, load up, load up
With rubber bullets
I love to hear those convicts squeal
It's a shame these slugs ain't real
But we can't have dancin'
At the local county jail
[Verse 3: Lol Creme & Graham Gouldman]
Sergeant Baker and his men
Made a bee-line for the jail
And for miles around
You could hear the sirens wail
There's a rumor goin' 'round death row
That a fuse is gonna blow
At the local hop
At the local county jail
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Whatcha gonna do?
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Whatcha gonna do?

[Bridge: Kevin Godley]
Sergeant Baker started talkin'
With a bullhorn in his hand
He was cool, he was clear
He was always in command
He said, "Blood will flow
Here, Padre
Padre, you talk to your boys
Trust in me
God will come to set you free"

[Verse 4: Lol Creme]
Well, we don't understand
Why you called in the National Guard
When Uncle Sam is the one
Who belongs in the exercise yard
We all got balls and brains
But some's got balls and chains
At the local dance
At the local county jail
[Chorus: Lol Creme, Kevin Godley & Graham Gouldman]
Load up, load up, load up
With rubber bullets
Load up, load up, load up
With rubber bullets
Is it really such a crime
For a guy to spend his time
At the local dance
At the local county jail?
At the local dance
At the local county jail?
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Whatcha gonna do?
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Whatcha gonna do?