[Refrain 1]
Now I stutter, now I dribble
Other than that, I'm lots like I was then
The decline and fall of me

[Refrain 2]
I just shaved my nose off, oh well
Other than that, I'm lots like I was then
The decline and fall of me

[Verse 1]
If I had a hammer, I would drop it and break it
Look at the pieces
Now I've got a hobby, I collect frozen pizzas
Check out my pizzas

[Refrain 3]
Now your jokes seem really funny
Other than that, I'm lots like I was then
Ooh, the decline and fall of me

[Verse 2]
Where's my mouth, man? This eating is rough on the shirts
Gee, I'm sorry about the thermometer, nurse
Would you tell me again? Which are girls? Which are guys?
Gee, I thought that this finger meant 'so long, goodbye'
[Guitar Solo]

[Refrain 4]
Chart position, bubbling under
Drowning and goodbye, future Mrs. Mael
The decline and fall, decline and fall
Decline and fall of me

[Outro]
I'm fading away
I'm fading away
I'm fading away