Last Friday night I was due out on a date
But unfortunately I got home really late
I didn't have time for a bath or a shower
There's only one thing that could save us
It's just like a shower but it's over the sink
The only thing that get's washed is shiny and pink
If there's a possibility of fellatio you have to make sure
That your knob doesn't smell like Quavers

A gentleman's wash
A gentleman's wash
If you think there's half a chance
Your cock might get a nosh
Pull your pants to one side
Wash the men that they hide
And that's a little gentleman's wash!

The other weekend I was out on the piss
When this girl who was wankered came and gave me a kiss
She said "I bet you've got a big knob 'cause you've got big hands"
Just like Peter Shilton
But I'd come straight from footy and I thought my cock must stink
So I rushed to the bogs and flopped it out in the sink
I thought if I'm gonna get sucked off it's only good manners to make sure
That my knob doesn't smell like Stilton
A gentleman's wash
A gentleman's wash
If you think there's half a chance
Your cock might get a nosh
Pull back your skin
Wash the helmet within
And that's a little gentleman's
Have a little gentleman's
That's a little gentleman's wash!