I'm feeling very poorly, poorly in my belly
But I promised to attend the fancy dress party
Before I don my outfit I go and have a big shit
Which is very runny and very, very smelly

LITTLE KUNT:
You can tell by his smell that he's not very well

So I get to the party still smelling slightly farty
I'm wearing a white clown suit and trying to clench my poo chute
I say some quick hello's to one or two fellows
Then I dash to the bog but the fucking door is locked
I'm trying to retain control of my poorly anus hole
I run back down the stairs but see someone I know there
I get stuck in conversation but my mind's on defecation
The stomach pains are sharp, maybe I can get away with just one parp?

LITTLE KUNT:
You can tell by his smell that he's not very well
You can tell by his smell that he's not very well

What could I do? I did a poo
I farted and I followed through
I made a mess on my fancy dress
I was a clown but now my pants are brown
What could I do? I did a poo
I farted and I followed through
I made a mess on my fancy dress
I was a clown but now my pants are brown

And I can't move but I know I oughta
My cacks are full of rusty water
And warm gravy is dripping from my bum
I've shit my pants in front of everyone