Let's slash Grandma’s tires on election day
Let's make her stay at home so she won't have a say
Sally, take her walker while I hide away her coat
Let’s make sure that Grandma doesn't vote

Let's slash Grandma's tires on election day
You've heard the things she says about the Jews and gays
Around the big Thanksgiving table, I won't say a single word
But now, let's not let our grandma's voice be heard

Oh me, oh my
Nana makes the sweetest peanut butter pie
Oh my, oh me
Grandma thinks Obama’s Sudanese

Let’s slash Grandma's tires on election day
Let’s save our country's future with a razor blade
A woman's place is in the kitchen, that's what grandma says
So she can stay there while we pick the prez

Let’s slash Grandma's tires on election day
She'll drop the bomb on China if she has her way
I don't care if my stocking is a measly lump of coal
Let's not let our grandma near the polls

Oh me, oh my
Grandma made me booties with some googly eyes
Oh my, oh me
Grandma's got Glenn Beck on her TV
G-R-A-N-D-M-A
Keep her in the house today
G-R-A-N-D-M-A
Keep her in the house