That monkey, who used to be so funky
Is now working for the Bureau d'No Change
That swinger, who used to be a gunslinger
Is now saying that his underwear is too strange

That editor who used to be a go-getter
Now puts a movie star on every magazine
That tripper who wore a psychedelic zipper
Is now hanging up pictures of the Queen

Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Play a little better, willya--this song is just a filler

That honey, who used to be a Playboy bunny
Is now developing instant rabbit pie
That nutcase, who used to have eccentric taste
Now eats it like it's going out of style

That stranger, who used to live for danger
Is now acting like he never was a teenager
That sister, she got herself a Mister
Squeals like a pig every time he gets a blister

Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Play a little softer, willya--those amplifiers'll kill ya
Those rockers with dirty pictures in their lockers
Now have them on their computer screens
Those groovers, those shakers and those movers
Don't get out much now that they can't fit in their jeans

That screamer, who used to run a tag team
Is now working for Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream
Making flavors that all the fat housewives crave
You can't blame her: it's the fat chicks she gets, it seems

And there's a lot of us are dropping like flies
It came on so quickly, it was quite a surprise
Everybody's talking 'bout the state of their health
And I'm not feeling too good myself

Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Play a little better, willya - this song is just a filler

Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Did everybody just get old?
Play a little better, willya - this song is just a filler