[Verse 1]
Told you once and I told you twice:
Why be mean when you can be nice?
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?

[Verse 2]
I hardly feel like a mustard seed
Because your love is what I need
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?

[Verse 3]
I’m the ace of hearts and she’s my queen
The best old girl you've ever seen
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?

[Interlude]

[Verse 4]
I told you, child, when you were sixteen
I wanted you, girl, to be my queen
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?
[Verse 5]
A bullfrog sitting on a lily pond
And I was holdin' her in my arms
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?

[Verse 6]
I call you on the telephone
Tell me why you’re never home
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misery?

[Outro]
Woo
Come on, be kind to me!
Can’t you see I’m in misereeeeeeeey?