[Verse 1]
It's a brand-new dance
For all you lunatics
Bust the liquor and your asses
Cocaine and "cruc-a-fix"

[Chorus]
Do the Christ
Do the Christ
Don't go against my medical advice

[Verse 2]
The move is fairly simple
There's really nothing to it
I've written some instructions
And this is how you do it:

Hold your arms out straight
Bob your head to the side
Just like the baby Jesus
When he was crucified

[Chorus]
Do the Christ
Do the Christ
Feel the nails as, through your hands, they slice
[Verse 3]
I want to be myself
Never, ever fucking conform
And I want lots of gifts, cool gifts
Just like when Jesus was born

[Bridge]
There's no moral to this story
Blood tears or thorny crown
I just wanna dance like Jesus
As if he was getting down

[Chorus/Outro]
Do the Christ
Do the Christ
Don't go against my medical advice
Do the Christ not once, but twice
Do the Christ
Do the Christ
Do the Christ