The bar will soon be closing
And lights they´re all turned down
Theres 3 girls in a corner booth
The fat one she´s passed out
Her friends they called me over
And it turned out she was stuck
With the help of 4 big bouncers
We put her in my truck
Me & old Jack Daniels
Had been together most of the night
Somehow he´d convinced me
She was the prettiest thing in sight
I got her home I opened the door
And I rolled her to my bed
The lights came on she opened her eyes
And this is what she said........
Wmmmm.......wmmmm ....wmmmmmmm
Wmmmm...wmmmm..wmmmmmmm..wmmm!
Morning came, that sun was up & there to my surprise
Was a big old girl with no clothes on
And Oprah Winfrey thighs
I sat up & fear set in
I found we were alone
She said that she was hungry
Whilst she was nibbling on a chicken bone
The words she said next scared me
And today the haunt me still
She said I hope you´ve got a steady job cowboy
I said why´s that sheila
She said I´m not on the pill thats why
I said oh!
With that in mind I tried to run
Lord I tried to get away
She ran me down & hopped on top
And here´s all I could say
Huh oh wmmmm. get off me......wmmmm ....wmmmmmmm
Wmmmm..ohh your crushing me.wmmmm..wmmmmmmm
Get off ohohoh..wmmmahh get off me you Heffer!