At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

At the mall is where I wanna be
A place where they have everything I need
I love the way their fountains always pour
And the way that they get trees to grow indoors

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

You could see a movie right next door
There used to be one screen, now there's 24
No X-rated, NC-17 (aww, you’re boring!)
The mall is nothing, if not safe and clean

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

At the mall, there's no gay bars or porn
A place where polyesters have been worn
I hope I find an easy parking spot
Where I might be forced to walk two blocks

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

Teenage girls hang out and look for males
When they get bored, they head in for the sales
Power-walkers get their exercise
And diet pills to shrink their thunder thighs

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

At the mall, they don't sell drugs or booze
But there’s 50 different places to buy shoes
One man plays the CDs that I bought
Cos anything I want and sounds good, he's got

At the mall, At the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, At the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

The jerks inside the mall are rather rude
Retail queens with major attitude
If I'm broke I won't take it too hard
Cos I'm a smart shopper with five (five!) credit cards

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

At the mall, it's never hot or cold
24 hours complete climate control
Escalators move from floor to floor
I ride them all day long and don't get bored
(cos I just love it at the mall so much!)

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

When I'm hungry the mall is where I fit
To eat the food and hot dogs on a stick
Some folks might say the mall is rather bland
But the food court gives us food from many lands

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

In the men’s room, you’ll glory holes
But be careful of the hairy trolls
Free sex can be so rad
One time I sucked off my best friend's dad

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, it’s always safe at night
Fluorescent lights forever burning bright
It's so well lit, I know I won't get robbed
My dream is someday I'll get a job...

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)

Every town as far as I can see
Stocked on every corner built for me
America is standing proud and tall
Cos now the whole goddamn country is a mall

At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)
At the mall, at the mall (ah-ooh, ah-ooh)