[Verse]
I'm in a tub full of Ben Gay
Listening to Marvin Gaye
Jacking off with the candles lit and some chardonnay
Romantic night, right?
White boys fucking crazy
Got the rhyme swine flu, not even Dr. Seuss can save me
Maybe, I'm chilling with a fine young lady
Then Gisele on her face, bitch call me Tom Brady
What I spit is so ill I think I gave the mic rabies
I got 99 problems and not one is if you hate me
Great, there he goes quoting Jay-Z
I'm 'bout to fly high boy and I ain't talking laced weed
Giovanna's tampons instead I ate the beat
See I never give a fuck like a girl that don't take D
I'm at McD's, my boys came to get me
I bought a small fry and a shake for 3.50
Of course, I drank the shake but threw the fries like a Frisbee
Then I ran out the door yelling 'bitch come get me'
And you can call me Cum Il Jong
How my dick taste like Dom Perignon
Go harder than it is and jack it off with no arms
When the pressure's on you folding up like a futon
Strapped grenades to my roller blades and skate
About a minute in my heart sank
And it was too late
My legs blew up and then I see my body flying away
All that's left is my heart, vocal box, and my brain
About an hour later's when all the scientists came
They took my parts and dragged them back to the lab with a chain
They made a monster mad action pack rapping machine
And then I broke out of the lab fucking angry and mean, RRRRRR
Damn Witty you delirious
Kill beats, zone out, wake up like Jodi Arias
Scary shit, like a fucking zombie on some heroin
I let them take a stab at the beat before I bury it but
They're still screaming 'fuck Witt
Sick of all your dumb shit
Waited 4 months for your tape, what the fuck bitch'
Dick covered in Fun Dip
Just missed Halloween so Walgreens got a sale
And now your tongue look green, you get it?
It means you sucking on my dick while you hate
You wanna board the Witty train
But man you 2 trains late
I wanna board this rap game but am I 2 Chainz late?
I've come to save and change the game
Before it too sames fate
I walked up in the price chopper
Where the fuck are the Fritos?
"Sir, I'm sorry we're all out
All we have are Tostitos"
So now I'm pissed off
I bought a whole bag of some Cheetos
And went home and wrote this whole rap with an axe and a speedo
Honestly, 99 percent can never understand me
The 1 percent that could would think that I deserve a Grammy
To the friends that stuck by me I'm considering us family
To the fans that stuck by me I'm considering us family
Peace