I'm in a tub full of Ben Gay
Listening to Marvin Gaye
Jacking off with the candles lit and some chardonnay
Romantic night, right?
White boys f*cking crazy
Got the rhyme swine flu, not even Dr. Seuss can save me
Maybe, I'm chilling with a fine young lady
Then Gisele on her face, b*tch call me Tom Brady
What I spit is so ill I think I gave the mic rabies
I got 99 problems and not one is if you hate me
Great, there he goes quoting Jay-Z
I'm 'bout to fly high boy and I ain't talking laced weed
Giovanna's tampons instead I ate the beat
See I never give a f*ck like a girl that don't take D
I'm at McD's, my boys came to get me
I bought a small fry and a shake for 3.50
Of course, I drank the shake but threw the fries like a Frisbee
Then I ran out the door yelling 'b*tch come get me'
And you can call me c*m Il Jong
How my di*k taste like Dom Perignon
Go harder than it is and jack it off with no arms
When the pressure's on you folding up like a futon
Strapped grenades to my roller blades and skate
About a minute in my heart sank
And it was too late
My legs blew up and then I see my body flying away
All that's left is my heart, vocal box, and my brain
About an hour later's when all the scientists came
They took my parts and dragged them back to the lab with a chain
They made a monster mad action pack rapping machine
And then I broke out of the lab f*cking angry and mean, RRRRRR
Damn Witty you delirious
Kill beats, zone out, wake up like Jodi Arias
Scary sh*t, like a f*cking zombie on some heroin
I let them take a stab at the beat before I bury it but
They're still screaming 'f*ck Witt
Sick of all your dumb sh*t
Waited 4 months for your tape, what the f*ck b*tch'
di*k covered in Fun Dip
Just missed Halloween so Walgreens got a sale
And now your tongue look green, you get it?
It means you sucking on my di*k while you hate
You wanna board the Witty train
But man you 2 trains late
I wanna board this rap game but am I 2 Chainz late?
I've come to save and change the game
Before it too sames fate
I walked up in the price chopper
Where the f*ck are the Fritos?
"Sir, I'm sorry we're all out
All we have are Tostitos"
So now I'm p*ssed off
I bought a whole bag of some Cheetos
And went home and wrote this whole rap with an axe and a speedo
Honestly, 99 percent can never understand me
The 1 percent that could would think that I deserve a Grammy
To the friends that stuck by me I'm considering us family
To the fans that stuck by me I'm considering us family