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Jerry Herman
The Letter

(Young Patrick is typing a letter on a typewriter.)

[YOUNG PATRICK]
Dear Auntie Mame
In English Lit I'm in the top ten
I got a B plus average again
Tahiti sounds the greatest of
All the crazy places that you've been
Wait 'til you hear the latest
I think I've got a whisker on my chin!

[OLDER PATRICK]
Dear Auntie Mame
I find it's getting harder to cram
I flunked my Latin grammar exam
I'm shaving every morning
And growing like it's going out of style
The debs all seem to go for me
Give France a big hello for me
A hug to Uncle Beau for me

(spoken)
Your loving nephew
Patrick