Well I started out to be a towboat man
But I never got the hang of a ratchet bar
I was growing up and decking in the Illinois trade
With the coal dust in my ear
I got stuck in the ice on Christmas Eve
And I froze my ass, it's true
Just a-shivering and a-shaking with a down south case
Of the steamboat whistle blues

Well way up north, I called you on the phone
But I couldn't get no one to answer
So I opened up the window and I smoked a little bit
And I watched the cars go by
I'm gonna hunt you up and ask you
If you found out anything new
Or are you a-hankering for the times you had
With the steamboat whistle blues?
I've been right here since nine o'clock
And believe you me, it's true
Just a-looking at the water ways a-turning
With that steamboat whistle blues, yeah

"Well far out, Johnny" I heard him say
As he stretched out back on the waterbed
Bluegrass music is a thing of the past
And the same for Rock and Roll
And I loaned him two or three dollars
And he told me the latest news
And then he left me here with the Rolling Stones
And the steamboat whistle blues
I'll take off down the river
One day before I'm through
And then I'll come back here and I'll see it out
With the steamboat whistle blues, get it on
Well the city's grown up and it looks all square
Like a crossword puzzle on the landscape
Looks like electric shaver now
Where the shithouse used to be
Oh the grass is all synthetic
And we don't know for sure about the food
The only thing we trust these days
Is the steamboat whistle blues, go

I'd sit and watch my TV
If I thought I could trust the news
About the only thing I trust these days
Is the steamboat whistle blues
Yeah the only thing I trust these days
Is the steamboat whistle blues