William Finn
Marvin Hits Trina
[MARVIN]
Hello, Trina, thank you for sending this
Goodness, Trina, I am relieved
Frankly, Trina, nice of you sending this
Thank you, Trina, I have received
Your new-sent wedding invitations!
They are

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
Pseudo-romantic and sick!

[MARVIN]
You say you'll

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
Love him until you both die!

[MARVIN]
You die on

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
May 27th at eight!

[WHIZZER]
He has lost his mind
Marvin is not so uncouth
Marvin is not so unkind
[TRINA]
Mendel plans to rub my back
Mendel's not a maniac
And he's sweet
And he's warm
And he loves me so

[MARVIN]
Tell me, Trina, what was the impetus?
Sorry, Trina, look in my eyes
Really, Trina, this is ridiculous
Jesus, Trina, how I despise
Your need for stupid conversation!
You are

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
Trying to ruin my sleep!

[MARVIN]
I'm sure you

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
Chose him to make me look bad!

[MARVIN]
How could you
[MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, & JASON]
Ever deny what we had?

[TRINA & WHIZZER]
We had fights and games
Marvin called us funny names
Marvin always played the clown

[MENDEL]
Marvin acts like he's untrained
Marvin, I am so ashamed

[TRINA & WHIZZER]
And he's sweet
And he's mean

[WHIZZER]
Do I love him?

(spoken)
No.​

[MARVIN, spoken]
I am so dumb.​

[WHIZZER, TRINA, MENDEL, & JASON]
Dumb
Dumb
Dumb!
Dumb!
[MARVIN, sung]
Why?

[Marvin slaps Trina across the face. She gasps.]