[WILLIAM FINN]
I had never met
A Republican
'Til I went to college
The mother of a classmate said she hated Bella Abzug
And I said, “Are you a Republican?”
And she just laughed
And I said, “Bitch.”

At a cocktail party given by this Republican
She said, “FDR, would you like some pâté?”–
She called me FDR!–
I said, “I don’t eat pâté served by a Republican!”
She said, “That’s undemocratic.”
And then she looked ecstatic
She said, “FDR, could you be gay?”
And I said, “You’ll have to ask Eleanor.”

So I went to bed
With a Republican
And he didn’t perspire!
He said–as we’re undressing–
He admires Richard Nixon
And I said, “Are you a Republican?”
And he just laughed
And I said, “Bitch.”